I feel the need to rant, and I’m sorry if what I am going to rant about doesn’t resonate with you, but I feel like I need to get this off my chest.
I just want to say the biggest fuck you I can to those out there that think as a full-time Mum, I sit on my ass all day and do nothing! Being a Mum isn’t all luxury hot chocolates in cafes with other Mummy friends or lazing at home in PJs watching crappy day time television with the kiddo. Sure, it’s not the mega stress that I am sure a lot of women will lead you to believe either, but it’s still damned hard work and tricky as anything to get right. Or even feel like you’re getting right. Mostly it’s being tired the second your child is asleep, looking over at your partner wondering if you really know them anymore because you can’t remember the last time you did anything with them, just the two of you. But it’s a decent, wonderful thing to do which you only get validation for when you look at your child’s face when they’re finally asleep and down for the night.
And of course, everyone in the wider world has an opinion on both parenthood and the way that you are doing your parenting specifically. Judgement is rife! Honestly, people who work a ‘normal’ job will be resentful because you get to stay at home all day and do nothing without knowing how hard it can be unless they’ve been there themselves.
But most of all, I just want to say the biggest up yours to those that make full time Mums feel like being a full time Mum isn’t good enough. Feminists that belittle women that choose to stay at home rather than pursue a career; believing them to be doing women a great disservice because they chose to bring up their children themselves. Heaven forbid a woman that wants to be a Mother rather than carry the flag of activism against a patriarchal society!
I once had a friend that believed everything wrong with the world was the fault of people that chose to have children. I didn’t understand this logic, but never questioned it until I had a child of my own – then I just labelled them as strange and moved on. If their parents didn’t have a child then he wouldn’t exist, if everyone followed that mentality then there would be precious few of us left in the world!
It’s an odd and ugly world out there right now, people you don’t know pass glances at you for the choices you make and way to do everything in their power to say that their way is the right and only way to do things. This really isn’t the case. Sorry I don’t share the sentiment of most feminists, I love being an active part in my sons childhood. If that’s not the choice that you’ve made as a woman or as a fellow parents then that is comepletely your choice – but don’t make me feel like utter shit because it’s not ‘good enough’ in your little heads.